William Orwell

steelopus:

1. Taco Bell
   • Tri-fold
   • Brown
   • Super absorbent
2. Burger King
   • Tri-fold
   • Moderately absorbent
3. Subway
   • Large
   • Moderately absorbent
4. Wendy’s
   • Yellow
   • Not very absorbent
5. McDonalds
   • Not at all absorbent
6. Sweet Lord
   • I eat too
   • Much fast food.

Incredibly useful. I had a prank plan where I’d put inspirational/demotivational quips on all my schools’ toilet paper (Don’t give up! You can do it!/Oh, shit!); someone already measuring absorbent qualities is tres magnifique.